When People You Care About Can’t Accept Your Path
There’s a moment that almost every Wiccan knows.
The moment when someone you like, someone you trust, someone you thought you knew — finds out. And everything changes.
Mine happened in the desert.
The Triquetra on the License Plate
My husband Ed and I are full-time RVers. We live in our travel trailer year-round, moving around the country with the seasons, putting down temporary roots in places long enough to actually know them. It’s a life we love — and one of the unexpected gifts of it has been the people we’ve met along the way. We’ve made more genuine friends on the road than we ever did in twenty years of living in a house in North Carolina.
So when we were wintering in southwest Arizona a few years back and met a new couple who seemed to have a lot in common with us, we were genuinely happy about it. They were believers — in our Lord — and that was something we connected on immediately. We visited frequently, the way you do when you’re parked near good people in a place you’re going to be for a while.
Then one day, she noticed the symbol on the front license plate of our truck.
A triquetra.
She asked what it meant. And so began the conversation.
We told her we were Wiccan. She was a devout Christian, and she argued her case — her beliefs, her concerns, her framework for understanding what we’d just told her. She said it didn’t matter. But after that, we spoke less and less. The visits stopped. The friendship quietly dissolved.
I haven’t seen her in several years now.
Looking back, I’ve made my peace with it. I knew there was nothing I could have said to change her mind. It wasn’t really about me being Wiccan. It was about me not being a die-hard Christian like her. That’s a gap no amount of explanation was going to bridge.
What That Experience Taught Us
What it taught Ed and me was simple, if a little sad: we just don’t tell people anymore.
Most of our friends and family have no idea we’re Wiccan. We keep our practice private, sharing it only with people we’ve known a long time — people we’re confident won’t let it change things between us. Even then, we choose carefully.
Our altar sits out in the open in our home. But we don’t generally invite people in unless we know them well.
I do have a website where I talk openly about everything — so if anyone searched for me by name, they’d find it. That’s a choice I’ve made deliberately, because I want to be a resource for people who are looking. But in our day-to-day life, on the road, meeting new people? We’ve learned to hold it close.
That’s the reality for a lot of Wiccans. It probably sounds familiar to you.
Why People React the Way They Do
When the word Wicca comes up, people almost automatically assume witch. And when they hear witch, the walls go up.
Here’s what I think is behind that reaction: everybody learned about the Salem witch trials in history class. But nobody ever heard the other half of the story — the side of the people being accused. Those women weren’t dangerous. They were herbalists and midwives. They had honed their intuition, talked to animals, kept track of moon cycles. They were accused simply because they were different. Because they held knowledge that made other people uncomfortable.
That fear got handed down through generations, and modern television keeps feeding it. The bad witch is everywhere on screen. And that image sticks.
But not all witches are bad. And not all Wiccans are even witches — which is something most people don’t realize.
Setting the Record Straight
Here’s something that surprises people: being Wiccan and being a witch are not the same thing. All witches are not Wiccan, and all Wiccans are not witches. They can overlap, but they don’t have to.
Wicca is a religion — a genuine spiritual path with a belief in a higher power and one guiding principle: “An it harm none, do as ye will.” That harm none piece is important. It’s the foundation everything else is built on.
Witchcraft is a practice — a set of tools and rituals that some Wiccans use, and some don’t. Some people who practice witchcraft follow no religious path at all.
When people ask me about my practice specifically, I keep it simple. I tell them it’s about saying intentions aloud — which helps get you in the right mindset to actually make things happen. Writing in a gratitude journal. Celebrating the Sabbats with seasonal foods. That’s usually enough for most people to relax a little. Nobody feels threatened by a gratitude journal.
I don’t go into detail beyond that unless someone is genuinely curious and genuinely open. You learn quickly how to read the room.
Not All Witches Are the Same
I want to be honest about something, because I think honesty builds more trust than a polished sales pitch.
Not everyone who calls themselves a witch follows the harm none principle. Chaos witches, for example, practice magic to get what they want — regardless of who or what might be affected. That exists, and pretending it doesn’t would be misleading.
But the same is true of every belief system. People use religion, medicine, authority, and ideology harmfully every day. The presence of people who misuse something doesn’t define everyone who practices it.
Wicca, at its core, is built on personal responsibility and the commitment to cause no harm. That’s the path I walk, and it’s the path I teach.
You Don’t Need Everyone to Understand
If you’ve had your own version of the Arizona parking lot moment — and if you’re reading this blog, chances are you have — here’s what I want you to hear:
You don’t need everyone to understand. You don’t need everyone’s approval or blessing or comfort with your path.
You need the right people. The ones who find you, recognize you, and stay. The ones who might not fully understand every detail of your practice but love you anyway. The ones who ask questions because they’re genuinely curious, not because they’re building a case against you.
Those people exist. And the beautiful thing about this path is that it has a way of drawing them to you.
In the meantime, your practice is yours. It doesn’t require anyone else’s blessing to be real, to be valid, or to be powerful.
Hold it close when you need to. Share it when it feels right. And trust that the right people will show up exactly when they’re supposed to.
They always do.
Ready to Learn More?
If you’re new to Wicca and looking for a gentle, welcoming place to start, grab my free Wicca Made Simple Starter Guide — it’s everything you need to take your first steps with confidence. Just sign up below. And if you’re ready to go deeper, I’d love to welcome you into the Wicca Made Simple Witch School, where we explore this path together in a supportive, judgment-free community.